Small minded big box retailing

Wal-Mart and Costco have adopted a new design for ye olde milk jug: a spout-less cube which apparently keeps the milk fresh longer and is easier to “palletize.” Alas, as it has no real spout, the milk spills everywhere while being poured from that contraption. Despite this little shortcoming, the new design has been hailed by both companies as one of the greatest achievements in modern retailing of perishable goods and “a great service to our customers.” The “spout-less milk jug” idea was apparently first promulgated by Lenin who said, “Screw the consumer!” and ordered Felix Dzerzhinsky (the leader of the Soviet state-sanctioned assassins “Cheka” - All-Russia Extraordinary Commission to Combat Counterrevolution and Sabotage) to shot on the spot the motherfuckers who didn’t like the idea of new milk jugs.